Not sure if I was ever meant to play baseball, but, for a time, if felt perfectly natural. I sometimes wonder if we are assigned dreams before birth, impossible missions never meant for completion, just so we could learn something from the failure.
Jose Canseco’s latest desperate attempt to sell books has gone too far. Fans and media alike must stop taking the allegations of individuals such as Canseco as absolute truth.
Picture this. You’re twenty three years old, a third round draft pick, skipped school to grab that bonus, nothing to fall back on. This competition is fierce, and you’ve been left behind, lapped in fact. In an idyllic youth, a minor celebrity in a small town, you were the special one. Gifted. Bigger, stronger, faster, beloved by all, took pride in the popularity, destined for greatness.
“How did you go bankrupt?”
“Two ways: gradually, and then suddenly.”
-Ernest Hemmingway, The Sun Also Rises
Thank you, Queens.
Thank you for doing the impossible.
Thank you for flooding the headlines and monopolizing the morning news.
Thank you for securing your own special spot in history and diluting ours.
Thank for liberating us from the stigma that has been emblazoned on our psyches since October 21, 2004.
And mostly, thank you for finally disencumbering us from the toxic ownership of “the biggest collapse in Major League Baseball history.”
Barry Bonds is the new home run king. He has hit 758 home runs in his career and hasn’t stopped. Hank Aaron hit 755. 755 is less than 758 thus Bonds is the home run king. Of course, we all know Bonds cheated to get there so that means his home runs don’t count. Right?
"Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world." -Bob Veeck, past MLB franchise owner
"I’ve come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen." -Bob Lemon, HOF-er
No one needs two catchers on his fantasy team. And no one’s going to win his league if his entire team targets one type of stat, whether it’s ERA, SLG, BA… 22 players with identical strengths will never give you the versatility and power to dominate a team of carefully selected position players that all satisfy unique roles. So, if we religiously apply this seemingly common knowledge to our fantasy teams, why can’t we apply these principles when coordinating other areas of life? Like…our friends.
For Coppin State’s baseball team, the NCAA tournament was never the goal.
After an offseason that featured its head coach resigning mid-summer to pursue a different career and all but three players quitting because of an alleged letter that Guy Robertson, the resigned coach, sent to convince the players to quit too, to an athletic budget that makes it a burden to purchase baseballs, the NCAA tournament was more than that clichéd dream from occurring. And no, they didn’t make the tournament, because you would have heard the story by now if they had.
Remember that old theory that as long as Bud Selig was Commissioner then the Brewers would be cellar dwellers? Throw it out. Built like the cast of a smash hit television show, the Brewers have assembled a team of guys who are establishing their identities with this team, playing the role they were born to fill.
Japanglicize v. (Juh-PANG-gluh-sahyz): to merge Japanese culture with that of English culture, ultimately enhancing both
I associate pasta with Sunday Night Football, hotdogs with baseball, Chinese food with rainy weather, and sushi with work. Those little white rice rolls, seaweed soup, and the green paste that masquerades as guacamole, conjure images of the suit-wearing, Blackberry-toting echelon of corporate America. Whenever a coworker suggests expensing lunch, I beg for Chipotle. But somehow I always get overruled and end up with an $8.95 lunch special on my desk (a "Bento Box," as it’s called), and a growling stomach for the rest of the day.
Recently, I was watching the Best Damn Top 50 Spectacular Plays and it got me obsessed with Top Ten lists. Naturally, I had to watch Who’s Number 1? and The Sports List afterwards, and yell at Summer Sanders when I disagreed. Now I’m hooked and I have been trying to think of unique top ten lists. With this list of the best sports casting calls of all time, I feel I’ve accomplished that (even if I could only think of eight worthy of the list).