I would rather have to give a conscious komodo dragon a hysterectomy then face the Indians in the next five years.
Despite giving away the American League Wild Card to Boston as a lovely parting gift, the Tribe only has prosperity to look to forward to in the future. After going 93-69 in what was supposed to be a “re-building” year, and having a farm system that seems to be producing future stars asexually; Indian fans should brace themselves for an epidemic that will be storming Cleveland in the upcoming summers known as “Tribe Fever”.
Mark Shapiro must have done something right in a past life because every prospect he has signed has hurdled the expectation of mediocrity that Cleveland fans have become all too accustomed to, and has swan dived right into potential greatness.
The most obvious evidence of Shapiro’s luck would be the young talented tri-fecta of Grady Sizemore, Jhonny Peralta, and Victor Martinez. Sizemore molded into the lead off spot with ease this past summer posting a .289 batting average and a .348 on base percentage. Not bad for a kid who could not even buy me a case of beer a year ago. Peralta and Martinez took leaps and bounds their sophomore seasons and became the three four punch in the Tribe’s lineup.
With his .292 batting average and a .520 slugging percentage, Peralta turned many heads this season, including those of opposing managers. Analyst and managers together, say that Peralta is making plays with his glove and stick that are Jeter-esque. Peralta’s counterpart, Martinez, is flooding highlights and fantasy baseball forums all over America. This switch-hitting, strong-armed catcher produced 80 RBIs with a .309 batting average. If Martinez can pick up where he left off next season then a plane ticket to Pittsburgh for the 2006 All Star game should be in his possession.
Then there is the scariest man ever to walk God’s green Earth, Travis Hafner. I swear that man was conceived in the bawls of Hell. I am convinced his face is the image you see on the back of your eye lids before you die. This 6’3″, 240 lb beast cemented his spot as the Indian’s designated hitter by posting a .305 AVG with 33 HRs. Not to mention he took a fastball to the face and did not even cry.
The only thing Cleveland’s front office will have to worry about this off season, is attempting to keep its disintegrating pitching staff together. Earning the reputation as one of the best bull pens in baseball this past season, free agency and contract issues could be the steak through Indian’s hearts. The pitchers on the chopping block are starters Kevin Millwood and Scott Elarton, setup man Bob Howry, and power closer Bob Wickman. Right now the Indians have Yankee’s setup man, Tom Gordon, in their crosshairs to replace the hard throwing closer, Bob Wickman.
Honestly, I had no idea Tom Gordon was still alive. I figured the 38 year old realized, like everyone else did, that he peaked when Steven King used him as a minor character in one of his books; so he just did us all a favor and burnt his baseball equipment. But apparently I was wrong, and now I might get the privilege to see Tom embarrass himself, and the city, on a daily basis.
The summer of 2005 resembled some sort of Cedar Point ride for Indian’s fans. This young team revived a city that was thirsting for some sort of athletic success by overcoming a dismal first third of the season and becoming playoff contenders. If this young team becomes as half as promising as they showed glimpses of, then house on the corner of Carnegie and Ontario could turn back into captivating hotspot it once was almost ten years ago.
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One reply on “Cleveland’s Own Baby Boom”
Nice I think you might have had one or two mistakes in the intro, but other than that I thought that the article was very good.