12-Step program to get over a football addiction after your team is eliminated from the playoffs

12-Step program to get over a football addiction after your team is eliminated from the playoffs:

1. admit that we are powerless over football and that our lives have become full of hate for football
2. believe that only a Power greater than basketball/hockey could restore us to sanity
3. made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of alcohol of our choosing
4. made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves [AA has this one correct]
5. admitted to alcohol, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our hatred for football
6. were entirely ready to have alcohol remove all these painful memories of football
7. humbly asked alcohol to make it so that the evils of football were as far removed from our conscious as basketball/hockey
8. made a list of all the good moments of the season and became willing to pretend that only those moments had ever happened
9. made indirect amends to all people we wished would suffer career-ending injuries over the course of the season, except when to do so would require us to not wish evil on [insert evil team of choice/Tom Brady]
10. continued to remind ourselves there’s always next year, and when we forgot that, promptly readmitted it
11. sought through alcohol and more alcohol to improve our conscious contact with alcohol of our choosing, drinking only for forgetting football season and the power to move on
12. woke up hung over and put on our team’s shirt to show we are over football season