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Trading Up is Hard to Do
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MLB General

Trading Up is Hard to Do

Posted June 14, 2006 by YankTank

My last boyfriend didn’t know what a bunt was. He thought it was some kind of pastry sold at Yankee Stadium. I would dangle baseball-relationship metaphors above his head, and he would just roll his eyes and return his attention back to playing Halo 2. Which is probably why warning him the trade deadline was [...]

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A Real American Classic: A Father’s Day Tribute
6
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General Sports

A Real American Classic: A Father’s Day Tribute

Posted June 16, 2005 by YankTank

“Never go down looking.” I only applied to one school, only wrote one college essay, waxed philosophical on only one “best advice I ever received” topic. I’m 24-years old, and now I look upon most baseball metaphors with a disdain usually reserved for ESPN writers. But I still hold my father’s sound wisdom, his insistence [...]

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MAY DAY
1
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New York Yankees

MAY DAY

Posted May 8, 2005 by YankTank

The Yankees are a mess. This news, of course, is about as breaking as Britney’s bun in the oven. But what IS stop-the-presses noteworthy is that the fans- who have thusfar been desperately clinging to a battle cry of “The season’s young!”- are beginning to slowly and listlessly accept this immobilizing truth. That our team, [...]

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Steroids vs. Gambling: The Deadlier Sin
4
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General Sports

Steroids vs. Gambling: The Deadlier Sin

Posted April 29, 2005 by YankTank

“In gambling, the many must lose so that the few may win.” -George Bernard Shaw I once asked a tech support guy in the Apple Store what the over/under line was on how long it would take to fix my ibook charger, and if I could arrange a payment plan based on the money line. [...]

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A Plea for a Breather
2
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MLB General

A Plea for a Breather

Posted April 21, 2005 by YankTank

My boss is in the process of buying a new apartment, so he says to me, “A study once reported, the 3 most stressful things to do in life are switch jobs, move, or get a divorce.” (Yeah, I think this is just how people in the pharmaceutical business talk. No claim can be made [...]

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Boston Fans Subscribe to Own Idiocy
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Boston Red Sox

Boston Fans Subscribe to Own Idiocy

Posted April 15, 2005 by YankTank

BOSTON (April 14) – After being routed by their sworn enemy the Yankees, Boston declared April 13 as the date for the collective recognition that both the Red Sox franchise and their fans are, in fact, idiots.

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The Boys Are Back in Town…
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MLB General

The Boys Are Back in Town…

Posted April 12, 2005 by YankTank

“Long is the way, and hard, that out of hell leads up to light.” -Dante, on the baseball off-season “What you have to remember is that a baseball isn’t a week or a month, but a season. And a season is a long time.” -Chuck Tanner Last year on January 1, I ignored a garden-variety [...]

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In Pursuit of NCAA Gambling Redemption
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College Basketball

In Pursuit of NCAA Gambling Redemption

Posted March 31, 2005 by YankTank

A year ago this Saturday, on April 3, 2004, UConn beat Duke by one point, and a 3-point shot made by Duke at the buzzer meant nothing to the outcome of the game, but everything to me. When UConn won 79-78, half the bar I was at erupted into cheers; half threw their hands up [...]

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