13 ways to make the BCS better

13. Change the abbreviation to Broken Computer System. Or take the C out. Admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.

12. Add to the ranking factors a cheerleader swimsuit contest. It’ll help just as much as everything else you’ve ever tried. Then admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.

11. Line a monkey cage with media guides. Place the teams in order of media guides the monkey relieves himself on. Use this to replace the New York Times computer rankings,which it would far surpass in accuracy. Then admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.10. Stop whining about how much school the kids would miss. Neither national champion was off Christams break for a week after their BCS Bowl; LSU was off until a week after the shoulda-been national championship game. Use this information in admitting you were wrong and adding a playoff game.

9. Also, forget the kids playing too many games. Oklahoma played 15 games, including the title games. 15 games is the length of a Division 1-AA season, all playoff games included. with this fact in hand, you’ll find it easier to admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.

8. The idea of losing the staple of college football, single-game importance, is bogus too. under the suggestion, it would be the same atmosphere, but with one extra game. So admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.

7. Stop yammering on about how it would cripple the crrent bowl system, which I admit is a great thing. We’re talking about one game. Just one. It won’t be airing during the time of any of the other bowls, and we usually weren’t watching them anyway. One game can’t hurt. So admit you were wrong and add it.

6. Get a permanent BCS commissioner. The revolving door concept suggests impermanence, which gets our hopes up, but also raises questions about what’s going on. Another thing that needs to be permanently added is a playoff game.

5. Divulge the BCS formula. I know I escaped Algebra II by the skin of my teeth; I know I couldn’t solve it. But not telling me what it is makes me angry. It’s called credibility, and your system needs it. Another thing that would help with credibility is admitting you were wrong and adding a playoff game.

4. Stop calling these BS conferences where nothing gets done.We’re not fooled by these minor changes; we know they’re cop-outs, thought up by you to try and convince us that the formula was finally fixed. If anybody was tricked by this, we’re not anymore. Use the aforementioned conferences to discuss how to word a staement admitting you were wrong and adding a playoff game.

3. Use the formula as basketball uses its RPI, as only a factor in its eventual decision to select teams for a tournament. The NCAA Tournament Selection Committee handled this one smarter than you. Not only did they use it as a factor, but before computers were invented they already had several playoff games, so by the time they needed to admit they were wrong and add a playoff game, they weren’t wrong and had already added a playoff game. You weren’t so lucky, so you’ll have to admit you were wrong and add a playoff game.

2. Give a trophy. the NCAA at this point does not even recognize an NCAA Division I-A football champion (the glass football is private), making us wonder why we have to. We also wonder why they won’t admit they were wrong and add a playoff game.

And number one (or seven, by the BCS computers)…

1. Admit you were wrong and add a playoff game. It would save a lot more face than your useless tinkerings.