By now, we all realize that athletes aren’t always the most intelligent people. In part, this is what scares me about Governor Jesse the Body Ventura. But that’s another matter. More than often, athletes say the most ridiculous things, making the rest of us ask each other, “Did they really just say that?”. I feel like this has been one of those weeks where the stuff coming out of the mouths of professional athletes is nothing short of ludicrous. Maybe it’s happening because Randy Moss is bored and doesn’t have anybody to offend during the off-season. Maybe it’s because Kobe’s lawsuit is coming to an end and he’s worried he’ll lose all the positive publicity he’s been getting lately. Well you tell me then? Below are some examples of recent comments made by athletes most of us love to hate. There’s just nothing better when a jerk of an athlete makes himself look even jerkier (how is that a word? Honestly?) with his own words. Let’s start with America’s 2nd favorite cheating husband. And if you don’t know America’s number one favorite, let me give you a hint. First name rhymes will Dill, last name rhymes with Binton. Well done.
After the Celtics – Lakers game (great game by the way), news was beginning to break out that Kobe’s lawsuit had been settled. Kobe refused to talk about the case, and said he knew everybody came a long way, but “y’all came all this way for nothing”. Actually Kobe, the world doesn’t revolve around you. Believe it or not, those other guys running around on the court with you matter too. And in reality Kobe, “y’all” got to watch a great game, and even if you don’t want to admit it, “y’all” saw you score no points in the fourth quarter and clang the game-tying three off the rim.
But Kobe was kind enough to talk about the shot and why he missed it. Conveniently enough, his itty bitty ankle hurt. “When your ankle is stiff, it’s tough to get the lift you really want. Back in the day when I was a kid playing in the yard, I never missed those.” Is he kidding us with this? When you were a kid? First of all, what does that have to do with anything, and secondly, why are you talking like you an old over-the-hill man? I bet when you were a kid you didn’t have four hands in your face when you were trying to make the three, did you? But here’s an idea. Next time, when your ankle hurts and you are double-teamed, PASS the ball to somebody else. Do the math Kobe. Four hands in your face means somebody else has NO hands in their face (and I bet their ankle doesn’t hurt either). What happened to this once unbelievably nice kid?
And one last thing about Sir Kobe. He openly admitted to being both an Eagles and a Yankee fan. How can you be an Eagle fan and a Yankee fan? This makes no sense to me. People shouldn’t be allowed to pick who they support. Support the hometown team or don’t support anybody at all. I hate the Jack Nicholson’s of this world that root for the Yankees, Lakers, and whoever else is going to win that particular day. Great actor, horrible fan.
Now let’s move on to the wonderful world that is Randy Moss. Talk about a psychologist’s dream patient. By now, we all know Randy “plays when [he] wants to play” and that he isn’t a big law-enforcement fan. Now he’s apparently “in love” with being a Raider and very excited to be playing with Kerry Collins. Kerry Collins? Are you kidding me? You’d rather have the ball thrown to you by Collins than Coulpepper? Give it a week Randy and I’m sure you’ll be yelling at him too. But this isn’t what bothered me. In fact, I’m glad Randy seems happy to be in Raider colors. Maybe he’ll turn his act around with this fresh start.
What really bothers me is that he is acting like he just got traded from a very bad team to a really great one. He says, and I quote, “with the Oakland Raiders, I’ve got a new start and a chance to go to the Super Bowl”. In theory, everybody has a `chance’ to go to the Super Bowl. But there’s a better chance Lindsay Lohan will go out with me than the Raiders have of making the Super Bowl. I’m too lazy to look it up, but I bet not many five win teams have turned things around and won the Super Bowl the next year. The Vikings were at least a playoff team and even won a game during the playoffs. If Moss really wants a shot at the Super Bowl, he should have asked to stay with the Vikings and cleaned up his act.
Moss added, “Who wouldn’t want to be in the Silver and Black? I’m committed to excellence and I just want to win, baby.” Well Randy, I wouldn’t want to be in the silver and black right now; not after the last two years. And if you just wanted to win, maybe you’d clean up your act so today’s winning franchises would bother taking a second look at you. Nobody doubts your talent Randy, we just wonder what the heck is going on beneath that fro of yours (if anything).