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College Basketball

The Madness That is March

Ahh, yes, it’s finally time. March: the most exciting month of the year. What could be greater than Spring Training, the final stretches of the NBA and NHL regular seasons, and my sister’s birthday all wrapped into one month?! Just kidding, it’s all about NCAA hoops during March.

March Madness is by far the most exciting time of year for sports. Sure, you’ve got the Super Bowl in January or February which is always exciting (unless Rex Grossman or Rich Gannon is quarterbacking one of the teams), and the World Series in the fall. But nothing, NOTHING compares to March Madness. From filling out brackets to Joakim Noah’s terrible dances, everything about the tournament is entertaining.

By no means am I a college basketball buff, but I know enough to be competitive in my bracket pools, and somehow I always get a fair share of my upsets right. So, while this isn’t a guide to base your picks on (you slackers who haven’t already filled one out…), but rather an overview of my foolish picks. So here goes nothing…

First Round: Is it a bad sign that I already lost the play-in game by picking Florida A&M? Well I can’t do any worse than zero.

Midwest:

Florida (1) over Jackson St. (16) — Ha. Hahahahaha. HA! Please.

Purdue (9) over Arizona (8) — I know Arizona has more talent and more athletic players, than the Boilermakers, but they also have a habit of choking. I figured I’d spare the Wildcats the trouble of having to be embarrassed by Florida in the next round. They won’t have to worry about the Gators, as they will get the boot in Round 1 from Purdue.

Butler (5) over Old Dominion (12) — No 5/12 upset here. Butler is number five for a reason, and though Old Dominion is a very good twelve seed, they are not as good as Butler. And Butler will prove that in this game.

Davidson (13) over Maryland (4) — Sigh. Go ahead, read it again. Or a few more times. I know, I know, trust me I’ve been hearing about it from my friends ever since I filled in my bracket on Monday. Davidson is a good thirteen seed, led by freshman Stephen Curry, and I have no faith in Maryland, let alone anyone from the ACC (besides UNC).

Winthrop (11) over Notre Dame (6) — Yeah, that’s two in a row, but this one isn’t as shocking. Winthrop is an extremely talented team. This, in my opinion will be the best first round game of the entire tournament, but Winthrop will show the Fighting Irish whose boss.

Oregon (3) over Miami of Ohio (14) — Coming off their dominant victory over USC in the Pac-10 final, Oregon will easily take care of the RedHawks. No buzzer-beating, off-balance, bank-in three for Miami this time.

Georgia Tech (10) over UNLV (7) — The Yellow Jackets is a very good team and could possibly cause problems for Wisconsin in the second round. It’s nice to see UNLV back in the tournament, but we won’t see much of them.

Wisconsin (2) over Texas A&M Corpus-Christi (15) — Why is Texas even showing up?

West:

Kansas (1) over Niagara (16) — Niagara falls (Ha…ha…ha…). Another snoozer.

Villanova (9) over Kentucky (8) — Nova will take care of the Wildcats in this game, though it won’t be easy. Why? I don’t know, I just have a feeling.

Illinois (12) over Virginia Tech (5) — Illinois is better than people think. Virginia Tech is not as good as people think. Hmm…1 + 1 = Illinois in the second round.

Southern Illinois (4) over Holy Cross (13) — The Salukis are solid and should take care of business against Holy Cross, no problem. We’ve got an all-Illinois matchup in round two folks!

Duke (6) over VCU (11) — Duke has me confused. VCU is a good team and I know a lot of people are thinking upset in this game. But, the Blue Devils have too much talent and their coach is too smart for them to lose in round one.

Wright St. (14) over Pitt (3) — What did I just read? Raise your hand if you just said that out loud. Pitt is NOT a great team. Aaron Gray isn’t playing very well, and the team as a whole doesn’t inspire right now. Wright St. on the other hand, another solid thirteen seed. Well, that should make things easier for Coach K’s team right?

Gonzaga (10) over Indiana (7) — Even without Adam Morrison, the Zags are a pretty good team. Derek Raivio is a good player and should lead them to a semi-upset of the overrated Hoosiers.

UCLA (2) over Weber St. (15) — Yeah, yeah UCLA laid an egg against Cal in the Pac-10 tournament. Whatever, don’t expect anything like that in this tournament.

East:

North Carolina (1) over Eastern Kentucky (16) — This will be a surprisingly close game, and Eastern Kentucky may just be the first sixteen seed to ever beat…alright that joke isn’t so funny halfway through the sentence.

Marquette (8) over Michigan St. (9) — Marquette is really, really, REALLY good. They’ve got some, um, ‘ballas’ over there. Michigan St. is a solid team too, so this should be an interesting matchup. The winner of this game will pose a problem for North Carolina in the second round.

USC (5) over Arkansas (12) — The Razorbacks are a joke. A big, fat joke. USC should absolutely steamroll them.

Texas (4) over New Mexico St. (13) — This will be another laugher. Kevin Durant scores 80 points and the Longhorns dominate New Mexico State, the least lucky thirteen seed ever.

George Washington (11) over Vanderbilt (6) — Once again, two very good teams. Vandy is full of talent and so is George Washington. Technically, Vandy is a better team because they are seeded higher, but I’m taking G.W. in this game.

Washington State (3) over Oral Roberts (14) — “Oral Roberts beat Kansas earlier this year; they’re a prime dark horse for the tournament!” I’m hearing that way too much. Give me a break. The Cougars take it easily.

Texas Tech (10) over Boston College (7) — This will be a great game. Boston College is a pretty good team, but they aren’t playing that well lately, and against a Bobby Knight-coached team, decent won’t be enough.

Georgetown (2) over Belmont (15) — Yawn.

South:

Ohio State (1) vs. Central Connecticut St. (16) — I have a financial tip for Central Connecticut St.: Please don’t waste your money on plane tickets.

Xavier (9) over BYU (8) — All the ‘experts’ think Xavier is good enough to beat Ohio St. in the second round. I disagree with that absurd logic, but they are definitely better than BYU.

Tennessee (5) over Long Beach St. (12) — Some people are excited about Long Beach St., but they’ve got nothing on Chris Lofton and the Vols. If you’re tuning into this game to see an upset, better change the channel.

Albany (13) over Virginia (4) — Yep. That’s two 13/4 upsets and one 14/3 upset in my bracket. This one is the least surprising. Albany is stocked full of talent, while Virginia is a product of a weak ACC.

Louisville (6) over Stanford (11) — This will be a good one, as the Cardinal is finally healthy again, and the Lopez twins should pose problems for the Cardinals. Rick Pitino will not allow a one-and-done for Louisville. I’ll take the plural to beat the singular.

Texas A&M (3) vs. Pennsylvania (14) — I fought the Law, and the Law won. That’ll be a common theme in this tournament.

Nevada (7) over Creighton (10) — Anyone who thinks Nevada will lose this game is in need of some serious medical attention.

Memphis (2) over North Texas (15) — The only way Memphis loses this game is if Durant throws on the wrong Texas jersey…and doesn’t notice…oh, forget it. No way Memphis loses.

Second round: So is everyone okay after my twelve first-round upsets? Yeah, I know what you’re saying, but it’s all irrelevant until the Elite Eight, where I believe I’ve picked all eight correctly.

Midwest:

Florida (1) over Purdue (9) — Still won’t be close.

Butler (5) over Davidson (13) — This will be a good game, but Butler is a superior team, and will prove it with a win over Davidson.

Oregon (3) over Winthrop (11) — I actually don’t think this game will be that close. Winthrop got their one win, and they won’t get anymore. Do you think Aaron Brooks the basketball player would’ve done better for the Raiders last year than Aaron Brooks the football player did?

Wisconsin (2) over Georgia Tech (10) — This one may come down to the final possession or even overtime. Two great teams pitted against each other, and they will both want it badly. Too bad Alando Tucker wants it more.

West:

Kansas (1) over Villanova (9) — Yeah, Nova’s good. Kansas is on absolute fire. I don’t think Nova can do enough to stop them.

Southern Illinois (4) over Illinois (12) — The Salukis are a much better squad than Illinois. This one won’t even be close. Salukis…man, that’s an awesome name. Fun to say. Saluki, saluki, saluki.

Wright St. (14) over Duke (6) — Please refrain from sending me angry letters and/or dead pigeons in the mail.

UCLA (2) over Gonzaga (10) — A great re-match of last year’s Sweet Sixteen game. The Zags won’t be able to keep it as close as last year after the loss of Adam Morrison. UCLA cruises.

East:

Marquette (8) over North Carolina (1) — This may be an even more dangerous pick for me than the Wright St./Duke pick. But seriously, Marquette is really strong and Tyler Hansbrough is not the same since he got that mask.

Texas (4) over USC (5) — Will the real USC please stand up? Thanks, now kindly exit the arena to the right. Mr. Durant would like to wish you a safe flight back to California, and thanks for trying.

George Washington (11) over Washington St. (3) — The Cougars don’t deserve such a high seed, and this is my punishment! Just kidding, I think G.W. is a better all-around team than Washington St.

Georgetown (2) over Texas Tech (10) — Georgetown is a dominant force. Texas Tech is not good enough to beat them. Try again next year.

South:

Ohio St. (1) over Xavier (9) — The ‘X’ factor? Well, no it’s not ‘X’ as in Xavier, it’s ‘X’ as in…Oden? Yeah, that’s right Oden will dominate down low and the Buckeyes take it.

Tennessee (5) over Albany (13) — This will be a good game, but Tennessee should pull away in the second half to bury Albany.

Texas A&M (3) over Louisville (6) — Acie Law is so fun to watch. So fun that I’d rather keep him around awhile longer than Louisville. The Aggies win big.

Nevada (7) over Memphis (2) — Memphis didn’t play many tough teams this year, and that’s why they got their generous number two seed and blown-up record. They will get a wake-up call from a surprisingly good Nevada team.

Sweet Sixteen: Interesting. The East region has the number one, three, and four seeds knocked off. Hmm.

Midwest:

Florida (1) over Butler (5) — Oh, Butler. Could be in the Elite Eight if they didn’t run into the Gators. Too bad.

Wisconsin (2) over Oregon (3) — Sure, Oregon will win their first two games, but they’ve been up and down all season, and unless they play perfectly like they did against USC to win the Pac-10 tournament, the Badgers will knock them out.

West:

Kansas (1) over Southern Illinois (4) — Southern Illinois had a pretty easy run to the Sweet Sixteen, so as they are lulled into a false sense of security, the Jayhawks will send them home before they knew what hit them.

UCLA (2) over Wright St. (14) — Wright St. will be the closest version of last year’s George Mason, but they aren’t THAT good. Not good enough to beat UCLA. Not good enough to keep it close much longer than halftime.

East:

Texas (4) over Marquette (8) — Texas and Durant will be too much for the surging Marquette team. Courtesy clap for Marquette though, who made a spirited run.

Georgetown (2) over George Washington (11) — Why are there so many George’s? Georgetown, George Washington, George Mason…Why am I avoiding the inevitable? The Hoyas advance to the Elite Eight, no problem.

South:

Ohio St. (1) over Tennessee (5) — I don’t think this will be very close. You know what the best part about Tennessee losing is? Bruce Pearl never has to take his shirt off again, and Pat Summit never has to sing. An entire year of peace and rightness in the world.

Texas A&M (3) over Nevada (7) — This will be a battle between Acie Law IV and Nick Fazekas. Not even close. A&M will obliterate the Wolfpack.

Elite Eight: So we’re down to eight. Three number ones, three number twos, a three and a four. The eight best teams in the country.

Midwest:

Florida (1) over Wisconsin (2) — The Badgers are good, but not Gator-good. Did you see Florida storm through the SEC tournament? It was unreal.

West:

UCLA (2) over Kansas (1) — Kansas has a tendency to fall behind sometimes and if they do that against UCLA, especially playing in front of a pro-UCLA crowd in San Jose, they won’t be able to bounce back.

East:

Georgetown (2) over Texas (4) — The run of Durant and Texas ends here. Roy Hibbert and the all-around superior Hoyas will give the Longhorns more than they can handle.

South:

Texas A&M (3) over Ohio St. (1) — Texas A&M will pull the upset in front of home fans in San Antonio, and send Greg Oden off to the NBA on a sour note.

Final Four: Don’t you DARE disagree with my top four!

Florida (1) over UCLA (2) — All that ‘home-court advantage’ the Bruins had been enjoying is now gone. With the crowd all pumped up, the Gators will let UCLA have it. This will be a somewhat disappointing Final Four game, as the Gators win by double digits.

Texas A&M (3) over Georgetown (2) — Georgetown is a great team, but the Aggies are going to lay down the law (Sorry, these ‘Law’ jokes just come so easily, I can’t help myself!). With a dominating performance, Law will solidify himself as the front-runner for Player of the Year.

National Championship: There are such things as repeats you know…

Florida (1) over Texas A&M (3) — Acie Law may be the best player in the country, but Florida is by far the best team. They will prove it in a thriller against A&M, which will come down to the last couple minutes. But when all is said and done, Joakim Noah (winner of ‘Ugliest College Basketball Player in the Nation” Award) and the Gators should be celebrating their second straight National Championship. Makes you wonder what’s being put in that Gatorade down there? (Two basketball championships, one football championship in just over a year?)

Comments, questions, requests, dedications, insults always welcome. Enjoy the madness.

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