Categories
MLB General

A Painful Confession

Sitting down during the brutal heat of August, foreign thoughts rummage through my mind.

Damn, still two games back, and Shit, the Phils are a half game back of the Astros, and Maybe we can catch them all if McKeon could get fired or realize that he should never use his bullpen.

And then I think, Why am I thinking about baseball?Sure, it may be the middle of August when the only other things going on are preseason NFL games, Big Brother 84, and the air condition. But it still is baseball, the most boring three hours and nine minutes of each day.

And then I thought some more and my brain admitted something that it never had before: I am a baseball fan.

It can’t be true, I thought, thinking some more. I am not that hopeless of a person!

But it is true: I am a baseball fan.

It may be painful to admit, heck, this is the most painful thing I ever did, but in hindsight there were signs.

For instance, take December of just last year. My precious, beloved Marlins signed Carlos Delgado. Now, had I been the casual baseball follower I claimed to be, I’dve been listening to the radio (or frequenting cbssportsline.com) and it would have taken me aback. “Well all be,” I’d have said. “That sure is one dandy of an acquisition. Maybe this will be the energy boost this team needs for next October when the baseball annual commences.”

But no, I did what only a fan would do: I talked about it. Yes, I, in the middle of December on Monday after a huge NFL weekend, decided to talk about baseball.

No, not “was engaged in a colleagues discussion” or “intrigued by the chatter of a transaction happened upon at the lunch table.” No, I began a rant about baseball.

And how about my refusal to go to mlb.com during the baseball season? That sounds un-baseball-fan-like, but it really is not.

Remember October of 2003 when the fish took home the prize? Ok. Remember September of 2003 when the Marlins rolled off win after win after win to wrap up the Wild Card? Ok. Remember August of 2003 when the Marlins went to Colorado tied with the Phillies and up about a half dozen on the rest of baseball and got swept, starting a string of eight loses in nine games (luckily the Phils would lose nine out of ten, starting on the same day)? Forgot that, right?

Well, the morning of the first game I went online to mlb.com to check for tickets. Sounds harmless enough. But then the Marlins collapsed.

I was helped out by the Phils struggling, but the overpowering force (some call it God; I call it Mel Brooks) was sending me a message. Since that day I have refused to go to mlb.com during the baseball season.

Only a fan would hold such a superstition.

And the final sign (and the most baseball-fan-like), I live on Long Island, New York. It is mathematically, scientifically, emotionally, physically, socially, religiously, and diabolically impossible NOT to be a baseball fan and live on Long Island. Had it not been for the Equal Rights Act of 1968, which prohibited discrimination in housing, it would be illegal for a non-baseball fan to live on Long Island.

I was not a baseball fan when I moved to New York on the cusps of the 1997 World Championship season for the Florida Marlins, but I was when the 54-108 Marlins finished the 1998 season.

New York changed me into a baseball fan. I did not want to admit it, but I guess I have to.

“I am a baseball fan.” Ten minutes ago I thought it; now I said it.

That wasn’t too painful, now was it.

But I’m still not going to watch the games. Those are still boring.

By bsd987

I have written for SportsColumn.com since 2004 and was named a featured writer in 2006. I have been Co-Editor of the site since January 1, 2009. I also write for BleacherReport.com where I am a founding member of the Tennis Roundtable and one of the chief contributors to both the Tennis and Horse Racing sections.

I am "Stat Boy" for Sportscolumn.com's weekly podcast, Poor Man's PTI.

I am currently a Junior at Rice University majoring in History and Medieval Studies. My senior thesis will focus on the desegregation of football in Texas and its affect of racial relations.

Please direct all inquiries to [email protected].

Thanks,
Burton DeWitt
Co-Editor of Sportscolumn.com

4 replies on “A Painful Confession”

Ouch Maybe we can start a painful realization support group. I can’t wait for hockey season to start.
Cheers.

what spelling mistakes? I read it over three times and did not find any, spell check did not find any, and nobody else has found any.

Are you talking about “I’dve”???

Please tell me where they are so I can fix them.

Western accent It’s, “Well I’LL be” not All be. If your gonna use different accents in your writing, consult with someone who knows the accent. Nice try though Burt :).

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *